Wednesday, February 4, 2009

It happened on Tuesday...

I read a post on a friend's blog not too long ago and it was about her putting her grandmother in a nursing home and my comment to her was that we were not far behind her. It happened on Tuesday. My grandmother spent her first night there. She seemed fine. She has Lewy Bodies disease. A combination of Parkinson's and Alzheimer's and it is fast and furious. And she was fine because she really wasn't sure where she was or why she was there. I know this is part of life, but I can't help but wish and be a little angry at what life sometimes does to you when you come to the end of it. I am afraid the end is soon. It will be a blessing. The world is strange to her...full of people she doesn't know and places that seem unfamiliar to her. It is the saddest thing I have ever witnessed. I am not so sad for her because she doesn't know that she doesn't know. My heart aches for my grandfather who can't seem accept the fact that she will not be coming home. He has not taken her medicine bottles there. He brings enough for the day. He has only taken a few changes of clothes. I guess in his mind he is putting off the inevitable as long as he can. My heart aches for my mom who is has now become her caregiver. I have no idea what to say to her...how do I comfort her as she watches this dreaded disease take pieces of her mom, his wife away. She was the best cook and she loved the Price Is Right. I used to watch that with her...you know back when cartoons weren't on 24/7. She was a huge Braves fan. We watched a lot of baseball together. Saturday mornings...she made breakfast for us every Saturday. We lived just down the road and would ride our bikes to her house. You know back when it was safe to do that. What is the silver lining? She has lived a full life. 5 children, 16 grandchildren, 30+ great-grandchildren. She is a born again Christian and she is a child of God. When she leaves this place, she will meet Jesus! I hold on to this...I hold tight to this. Love you Grandma!

1 comment:

Amy Wallace said...

I have chills....oh baby girl I know I know how you feel. Well, expcept we don't have the diagnosis to deal with. Its so sad but you are right about the silver lining! God is so good ... all the time. Let's try to remember that together !